OF Netas (Politicians) and Black Dogs.

After I wrote my humorous blog about Shah Rukh getting an ‘Honorary Black Belt’ award for his exposition of Karate skills in bollywood movies, I got a lot of interesting responses from readers.

You may recall that a certain Neta from Bihar was upset that he had not been considered for the award despite his wife calling him the ‘World’s biggest Kharrate’ expert. The neta’s lawyer had a tough time convincing his powerful client that there was a big difference between kharrate and karate the former being the Hindi word for ‘snoring’.

When last reports came in from my detective friend Alpohonso, the neta was fuming and hair around his ears were in flames. I have just now received an SMS from Alphonso that the neta has been ‘somehow‘ convinced.

I asked Alphonso to find out how the lawyer managed to convince the neta who is known never to change his mind on any matter? Apparently the neta has been told that the ‘Black belt’ award was in any case not appropriate for him since he only wore pyjamas and kurtas whereas Shah Rukh Khan wore trousers even when he played a country bumpkin tilling land in rural Bihar.

But the lawyer was in for a shock when the neta told him’ ‘Tell the organizers that they must institute a ‘Black Nadaa’ award for leaders of toiling rural masses like himself..Varna…’ The lawyer has taken it up with the South Korean organization. Watch this space for developments.

I understand that the Union Minister Azhagiri may be a contender with his violent credentials. Now comes another complication. One fine afternoon the neta flew into a rage.

‘Kaun hai jo mereko kala kutta nahin bheja?” he fumed .’ Haan mere paas saikdon gaay aur bhans hain. Iska matlab yeh nahin hai ke main kutta naihn paloonga’.
His secretary asked what his anger was about.
‘Yeh dekho. Is akhbaar mein likha hai ke Mallya ne har parliament sadasya ko Black Dog bheja hai.Mereko kyon nahin bheja?’
‘ Agar main minister hota to main usko aadesh deta ke who OBC waalon ko teen kutta reserve karen’
‘Saabji Black Dog ek kutta nahin hai’ said his secretary
‘ Tum kaun ho jo mujhe sikhana chahte ho ke black dog kya hota hai ?’
Saab Black Dog ek ek ek ..’
‘Kya ek ek ek kutta ke tarah bhonkte ho ?’
‘Saab who ek ek ek’’ he trailed off in fear
‘Theek hai who kutta nahin hai to ek kutti hogi ’
‘’Saab who na kutta hai na kutti.. who ek whisky hai ‘
He translated the rest of the article into Hindi. The MP Vijay Mallya had sent a bottle of Black Dog whisky to each member of Parliament.
Peace was restored in the neta’s house but as Alphonso was about to cry off for the day came a brief message from him.
Apparently the Bihari neta had a visitor from a neighbouring state a lady with a large visage. Armed with his new vocabulary in English our neta was full of confidence .
He noticed that the lady was not only large and dark skinned but was also accompanied by a small pet dog, a black terrier.
‘Yeh kya ajeeb cheez hai. Ek bhains ke saath ek bottle whisky’
Mallya nein aapko bheja hai kya ?”
K.R.RAVI
U.S.A